This week I read an article called "Friends, Until I Delete You." This article talked about the "Whopper Sacrifice" which was a deal Burger King made that offered people a free hamburger if they would delete 10 of their Facebook friends. Everyone knows that Facebook sends an alert when your friends do almost anything, but "defriending" is not one of those alerts. Burger King took this opportunity to send out notifications to people letting them know they were being "defriended" in exchange for a hamburger. This is the reason Facebook suspended the program. In the end Burger King's campaign had ended 234,000 friendships!
I did not hear of this campaign while it was happening but I found this article hilarious. I know my friends and I definitely would have defriended 10 people in exchange for a hamburger. I have defriended more than 10 people and got nothing in return. This article brought up a major question within social media: when is it ok to defriend someone?
While I would love Facebook to be an intimate form of social media that I just share with my friends and family, this is not the case. The proper etiquette on Facebook is to accept almost anyone that you have ever met. Freshman year of college I would go out and meet hundreds of people, only to find the next morning that they had asked to be my friend on Facebook. You obviously can't reject them. What if they end up being in one of your classes, what if you end up becoming best friends with them? This led to a huge increase in my number of "friends." But now, being a junior, I just recently decided to defriend many of my Facebook friends. My criteria for defriending was "Will I ever see this person again?" If the answer was no, they got the boot.
On the reverse side, however, I don't like being defriended. Not even by people I know I'll never see again. That moment when you click on a "friend's" picture so you can be directed to their profile only to find that you can no longer look at their profile stings a little, doesn't it?
So what is the proper defriending etiquette? Is there any? Should you keep all of your "friends?"
Maybe this is a chance for a new form of social media to begin where it's acceptable to only be friends with your real friends, and people you've only met once won't be hurt when you deny them.
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Caroline- I love your post because I have pondered many of the same questions throughout my facebook using experience. "So what is the proper defriending etiquette? Should you keep all of your "friends?" The only people I have ever defriended on facebook are those who have personally wronged me. (AKA: a few of my ex-boyfriends.) I know this probably sounds immature, but it's true. I don't know why, but I can't get myself to go through my list of facebook "friends" and pick out those I am not actually friends with and defriend them. I tried to once, but after defriending one person, I felt this odd sense of guilt. Haha.
ReplyDeleteSee, I personally look at facebook etiquette a little differently than you seem to. Where you think it's rude not to accept someone's friend invite if you've met them, even if only briefly, I do not. I have met people out at some social event who then asked for my facebook friendship either that night, or the following morning, and I have declined. I would rather decline a friendship request right off the bat than visit his/her profile later and ask myself, "Now why did I accept this facebook friendship? I barely know this person and will most likely never see him/her again." I guess it's just a matter of preference when it comes to facebook etiquette.
This leads to my input on your comment, "Maybe this is a chance for a new form of social media to begin where it's acceptable to only be friends with your real friends, and people you've only met once won't be hurt when you deny them." I think a new form of social media, such as this, would be beneficial to those who deem it rude to deny facebook friendship requests from mere acquaintances. However, for people like me, who do not think it rude to deny a friendship request from someone you barely know, would not find a new social medium such as the one you mentioned very beneficial.